Saturday, October 4, 2014

10 secrets to living your life with intention

Life isn’t all about rush, rush, stop and take in the bigger picture. Picture: Brendan Ra

WHAT’S the biggest difference between people who live full, rich, meaningful lives and those who don’t?
The art of living with intention.
It’s easy to let life happen to us, to accept our day-to-day as it unfolds and never question what it brings.
It’s so simple, in fact, that we don’t even realise we are doing it. We forget we have huge personal power.
We can drive, direct and change our lives. All that’s required is a shift in mindset and commitment to action. The good news is, you needn’t waste a single more moment living without intention.
Here are 10 actions to live life by design, instead of by accident:

1. Ask yourself, what does success look like to me?
Not to your parents, your peers or your boss. To you. Is it rich with quality time spent with your children? Is it spent travelling two months of the year? Is it launching an entrepreneurial venture? Is it being and expert in the field you are most passionate about? Getting clear or what you value and taking the necessary steps to seize it is a reflection of reaching your highest level of maturity, regardless of your age. Freedom, certainty and happiness are the rewards.
 Young couple holding glasses with champagne and woman looking for them, outdoors, focus on woman with red hair and man Think...
Take time to celebrate the little things and don’t sweat the small stuff. Think Stock Source: Supplied
2. Picture a day in your ideal life
Where are you? Who are you with? What is your time spent doing? As a life coach that uses this exercise regularly (with people of all backgrounds), I realise how little money actually ever comes into it. Your ideal life can often be closer and more attainable than you think.
3. Get real about your fears
We humans have many fears, but they typically fall into one of two groups. The first is not having enough — from an evolutionary standpoint, we need daily nourishment to survive.
Our lives have evolved but our fear of not having enough hasn’t — hence our consumerist cultures and constant desire for more.
The second is the fear of not being enough — smart enough, rich enough, thin enough, popular enough. Remember everyone has these same fears at our core — have fun even guessing the subtext of other people’s words and actions. Realising these fundamental, human fears help release their power over us.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others
Buddha said, “comparison is the thief of joy”. Comparison is the ultimate enemy — it’s a never ending, losing battle. We tend to forget that comparison is elective, exaggerated and unreal. Your friend might have scored an awesome promotion but his son might be struggling at school. Your roommate might have an incredible figure but suffer from acute anxiety or be insecure in romantic relationships. Focus and commit to being the best version of yourself.
It’s easy to get caught up in stress but life isn’t about always being in control.
It’s easy to get caught up in stress but life isn’t about always being in control. Source: Supplied
5. Remember, you can’t control everything
Life has so many forces greater than us at work. You can’t change the weather, the economy, people’s attitudes or the traffic today. I once heard that we can control only 20 per cent of our daily lives. But what we can do is give 100 per cent to our 20 per cent and surrender the rest. Doesn’t that take the pressure off a little?
6. Let 10 minutes daily transform you
Every morning, spend 10 minutes when you first wake up — even if you have to wake up a little earlier — thinking about the day ahead and what you want from it. No reaching for your phone as soon as the alarm stops. Think to yourself — how do I want to feel today? What would I love to achieve? Even the small, simple things count — like calling your brother, researching an interesting course or writing a thank you card.
The first few minutes after waking are the most crucial in setting the tone and your mood for the entire day. Make tea or coffee if your wish and just spend those precious minutes visualising the good day head.
7. Listen to your inner voice
We all have an internal guiding system. Oprah calls this our Emotional GPS. Those who live their lives with purpose tune into theirs regularly through whatever means it speaks to them — in stillness, walking, meditation. Your heart knows all things. It’s when we betray it or try to tune it out that things go awry. It will never be silenced, no matter how much you try. Pay attention and obey it. Little by little, your life will transform when you do.
Stop and smell the coffee, it will help you keep a check on reality. Picture: Thinkstock
Stop and smell the coffee, it will help you keep a check on reality.  
8. Protect and direct your energy wisely
I am a large proponent of eliminating what does not serve you in your life. This pertains especially to people. So often we keep people we know in our lives out of habit and obligation. It is impossible to be a real, consistent and present friend to 12 or more people — especially with the daily demands of life. Choose friends that uplift, support and inspire you. Get around them more and be a giving and encouraging friend too. Give yourself permission to disconnect, if you need to, from others with love. Energy is currency — invest it where it matters most.
9. Remember the impermanence of all things — including life itself
The only constant in life is change. Therefore, the more we welcome change and the less we become attached to things — jobs, possessions, circumstances of any kind — the easier life becomes. A mindset of, “when something does not go my way, something better is waiting” always proves true. Let this guide you through tricky times.
10. Keep a reality check
Ancient Greeks used to understand and practice two important philosophies. Firstly, they understood that happiness was the joy you experience when you are striving towards your potential. So keep growing!
Secondly, they believed in “practising death every day.” Remember your time on planet earth is fleeting. Everyone’s is. Let this motivate you, drive you and eradicate your concern about what other people think.
Getting clear on what you value, planning each day with intention, surrounding yourself with supportive people and staying true to your purpose are the key ingredients to living your life by design. Go ahead, let your power astound you.

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